Defenses that won't hold up in court: a) she offered b) she was down there anyway.

Bloggers, beautiful bloggers, welcome. Welcome to How I Met Your New Cistern. A much short tale than How I Met Your Mother, I promise.

Let's start at the very beginning (A very good place to start)

Woohoo. Love me some mission brown and mobility aids! And all of that room to hold toilet paper - that thing there would hold what, 17 rolls? 

After a paint job!

Now obviously, the removal of the brown has done a lot here. As has the removal of mottled glass. Much lighter and fresher. But that cistern, yuck. Yellow discolouring, visible pipes. Nope. Not living with that. 

So off Squirrel and Badger went to buy a new cistern! $77 for those playing at home, but this was at trade price, thanks to Badger. 

This girl loves new dresses. But dresses are on hold until this house is done! Toilet purchases are more fun anyway, right girls? Girls? Anyone? Oh god I want to buy dresses.

Here is badger, reading the instructions.

After pulling the old one off, adjusting the height of the tap, and cutting a hole to install new backing for the cistern to attach to. 

Here is squirrel helping in a 'pass me the shifter' capacity. Also playing with the new seal which we got for free when Badger went back to the plumbing shop - the salesman asked if it was for 'that charming daughter of yours' and gave it to him for free. Haha! I'm charming. 

Normal poses are unheard of in our family. Vacuuming after the worst job in the world - plastering. (I say worst job in the world, but I've worked in finance, so after that, nothing is too bad. True story)

And so - the plastering is complete, and squirrel gave it an undercoat and two top coats to get us a blank canvas once more.

 And - it's complete! Hanging the cistern was the easy bit after all of the other stuff! How much better and cleaner does that look?!  Below is a side-by-side for comparison!

And so completes the smallest room of the house! Looks a million times better. We're slowly removing all signs of age from this house. It's incredible to look back on the before pictures to see how far we have come. The inside of the house is now, for all intents and purposes, brand new. And it's all been cosmetic. Amazing. 

The biggest of all thank-you's to the Badger for all of his work here. We heart Badger.

Lastly, here is a little purchase for the back of the toilet door that Squirrel wants. If you're going to have a bit of a session you may as well learn something useful. You never know when you may need to take control of a police car while on a high speed pursuit. OSCAR CHARLIE FOXTROT !!!! From here  $12.07 - Just choose a colour! I'm thinking a bright green! 

Bring me a shrubbery

Welllllll bloggers. It's day 8 of Puffin and Squirrel being away from one another. And guess what? It still sucks. At least on Squirrels end. But, not one to wallow, there's plenty of things to keep me busy! Now I don't think it's been mentioned on this blog, but Puffin is a Myotherapist! And a bloody good one at that. As well as working at a Spa, he also does massages at home, in what will be our office.

Puffins last massage before he left for Thailand was on the Badger - and given his table has been needing some repairs for some time, he left it here with us. Badger made the required adjustments, and after that, Squirrel was looking at the table cover and thought, 'dear god that looks awful'. You may have guessed by now - we're fixers. So I picked up where Badger left off and set about making a new massage table cover.

Before. Quite sad. Lots of holes, face hole had ripped heaps, it was sagging, just really, really sad. 

Measuring up.

Making marks for top of table and adding in fabric for sides and seam.

Making the seam for elastic.

Threading it through. This took like half an hour. Argh. Bad TV at this time of day, by the way. 

Luckily, I hadn't just made a shower cap. I then took this to the table to check (for the 15th time during making this) that it still fit, and it did. So I set about making the face hole.

And here is where the progress shots on the face hole stop. Wow. Trying to make a neat edge in a CIRCLE is fucking hard. Took me two goes. Had to unpick the whole lot. Urgh. It's fixed now, but I'm still considering down the track, running it down to the alterations shop to get him to overlock this face hole.

And ta-da!!! Doesn't that look better? But the alterations to massage as an activity in the office weren't complete! 

 We had a few sections of spare carpet left so I took it to an overlocker in Ballarat, who cut, joined and overlocked a section just big enough for the table! Not too big so that is a tripping hazard, or takes up too much space in the room. We also had a section made for the front door. 

And there you have it! If I had brought a table cover, I was looking at $47.00 off eBay; but I couldn't get one the right size! And again, an indoor door matt would be at least $30, and add to that a custom matt for under the table and we would have been looking at about $110. 

Instead - DIY and using what we already had - $40 for overlocking, and $16 for fabric and elastic - total $56!! That's half the price!! 

Then I got Mary pregnant.

And man that was all she wrote. Squirrel cannot wait to see the Boss with her Mum and Ezzy B! I was born in the USA! We go down to the river! And on the streets of Philly!! In her secret garden!! Oh. It's going to be cray cray.

Well bloggers, not much has been happening at the house of Squirrel & Puffin these last few weeks. Puffin is overseas with his Puffin family and Squirrel is starting to get towards the end of her uni year. Squirrel is writing part of this while watching the Singapore Grand Prix and dreaming of going there next year or the year after to see it. Squirrels dream for retirement is following the Grand Prix circuit around the world, but she doesn't know how this will happen. Even if it was just one year. All those gorgeous locations. All of that speeeeeeeeed. Yes.

Anyway. The couch arrived! Here it is with the gorgeous pillows picked up from Adairs at 30% off!

The awesome delivery guys set it up for us (thanks, Freedom!) but unfortunately set it up facing the wrong wall, and I wasn't strong enough to lift it on my own into the right position, but nonetheless I took my photos and my lord it is gorgeous! And comfortable! And the pillows looks awesome! But I think it needs a rug or something on there or another pillow up the other end? It will all probably make more sense once the room has some other things in it; prints on walls etc.

I'm happy with the colour of couch against walls, carpet, blinds etc. And I've come to a (somewhat important) decision. 

The style of the house.

I've always loved minimalistic, nordic sort of design. Unfortunately, given the age of the house and some of the un-removable features, I was not going to manage that here. What compounded that was Puffins refusal to have floorboards in the lounge room. Then I kind of toyed with industrial but again, the carpet did me in. 

So my theme is: blank canvas with bright pops of colour. Except the colour red as I hate it for interiors. 

Now, there need to be some thanks go out this week. The biggest thanks goes to my Uni - for awarding me a scholarship that paid off the balance of the couch and part of Steve's birthday present! And also removing a weight from my shoulders. My second biggest thanks, especially given that Puffin has been away, goes out to my girls at Uni. If any of you are reading this (especially Mia, Gabbi, Crystie, Alysha & Jameson) THANKYOU! For keeping me sane, helping me when I felt like I was drowning with this policy assessment, and for the gorgeous lunch that we had on Tuesday at the lake! And for the laughs. I love you girls.

Can we turn our beds into bunk beds?

Think I've got it down to these two from Milan Direct - thoughts? 

Pap Tests - because you only live once! YOLO!

Here's one for the girls: so all of you men reading this blog (Which must be what, 3 of you), switch off now!

Things Squirrel loves:

• Shopping
• Getting my hair done
• Having a massage
• Going to Uni (sad, mature age student speaking here)
• The internet
• Steak
• Puffin

Things Squirrel (and all women, I can safely generalise) hates:

• PAP TESTS.

But you know what? I'd rather have a quick and pain free Pap test than Cervical Cancer. So that's that. 
So here are five facts.

• Regular Pap tests can prevent around 90% of cervical cancers. 
• Cervical cancer is the 3rd most common cancer in women worldwide.
• You’re still at risk if you haven’t had sex for a long time, you've been with the one partner for ages or you’ve had the HPV vaccine.
• 90% of cervical cancer cases are preventable with regular Pap tests.
• A Pap test does not test for sexually transmitted infections, which is why you should ask about being tested for Chlamydia at the same time

If you want to see the work Squirrel and her uni team mates are doing, check out this link on Facebook and make sure you 'like' the page.



PapTestsYOLO


And because you only live once, check out this totally unrelated video, if you haven't already. (Care of Squirrel&Puffins awesome friend, Mitchy - thanks Mitchy!)

Now he's getting a tattoo yeah, he's getting ink done, he asked for a 13 but they drew a 31.

If I was ever forced, or bribed, or dared with a million dollar outcome, to get a tattoo, I would get a blueprint of a Millennium falcon. Which I think is really unique and is something I wouldn't get sick of, because, hello, Star Wars is my favorite documentary of all time. But a quick Google search shows stacks and stacks of people who already have that as a tattoo, so in fact, not so unique. Which is kinda reminiscent of the goth/emo movement; "I'm different, just like everyone else". You know what would be a truly unique way of dressing? Dressing like a unicorn every.single.day. But no one does that, not even people striving to be painfully 'different'. And I think they suffer for the lack of glitter and magic in their lives.

You know what else is not particually unique? A white kitchen. But you know what? It's a classic decision. And you know what else? Our white kitchen arrived on Friday!! 

Now Ima not gonna lie, in my head, this arrived and we were able to put them in their positions straight away so we could take some good photos. Alas, this was not to be, but LOOK! Kitchen!! Let me take you through. 

So here is all is! The big thing to the right is our bookshelf! And stacked on top of one another to the left is the left corner cupboard and sink cupboard. The corner cupboard - you're looking at the rear, and the left side of it is a push to open cupboard to go under the bench.

A different view, and you can see another corner cupboard (with spinners inside) and some of the kickers.

And another angle - and here, in their approximate positions, the extra pantry (two big drawers go underneath - all soft close, like the rest of the kitchen) and the side of the bookshelf. 

Out in the shed we have the stuff that goes up high, and the bench top, which you see here draped in sheets. It's all in one piece! I actually saw the kitchen on Thursday at the cabinet makers, all assembled, and it looked stunning! And really big! 

The unit for above the fridge and for above the oven area (range hood already installed)

And just a close up of the bench top and the colour of it. And the colour of my runners. Yes I'm wearing jeans and runners. Shut up.

So all that remains is the install! We're still working out what we're going to do there as we have a number of options! We can't wait to put some progress shots in from that adventure but we don't know when that will be as this week Puffin is heading off on an adventure to Thailand. He's been you-tubing videos of how to land the plane if things go wrong, and has been instructed to avoid all monkeys like the plague. 

We wish we had better photos to show you all but hopefully there will be more down the track! 

I am now telling the computer exactly what it can do with a lifetimes supply of chocolate, or, Operation:Front Door.

Aha! Now progress resumes! We have had some electrical works done this week but there's not really anything you can see, so here is something you can see! I bet you can't believe it's not butter.

Front door, it's time for your close up. Lets make you extra big to see some of that depressing brown vortex of doom.

And a bit closer - let's admire the amber bullion glass! And the solid wood door! Which isn't so bad, but didn't suit us.

 And here's where we are now - the new, more modern front door, and the clear glass panel. I'm digging the teal with additional widening strip and patch work.

So after cleaning the glass down, we peeled back the backing film and sprayed the shit out of it with a water/dishwashing liquid mix.

Spraying the glass too!

Then holding it up and positioning it against the glass.

 Then starting to work out the bubbles - I was glad for my Smiggle decal practice here! 

Getting there, getting there. 

And paper off!! We are so modern. 

And from inside. So slinky! And then we undertook the painting of the door! 

Cutting in, cutting in. This was largely a disaster due to the paint having grown a skin so I had to thin it out but had no stockings on hand to strain it, so I had to keep picking out lumps. Also I didn't have much undercoat left so as seen below, it is a very thin undercoat. Plus I didn't have painting tape so I had to use some old masking tape and some electrical tape.

Hmm. why do I miss the blue? Next - top coat! 

Ta-Da!!! Here she is! After two coats!  It needs a little tidy up here and there, and we need to put some seals on it, but for the most part, it is DONE! This was also a small disaster due to some misinformation from the paint girl at Bunnings (said it was oil based, and surprise, it wasn't) but it's done now! 

 & close up....

And some nice little befores and afters! What do we think?!?!

To do out the front: remove awnings (they're stuffed anyway), paint trim (the brown we showed in an earlier post) and dig out an area for a moat and drawbridge. And add a garden. And piranhas. With laser beams on their frickin heads.

But I just had to look, having read the book.

Oh, the disappointment of the film adaption of a book. Case in point is of course Harry Potter (ooooh, controversial!). But seriously though, The first few films were utter rubbish, and towards the end...well it did get better. But there were a few glaring errors. Like, why didn't Wormtail die? Like if we're omitting that, why did we have to have Hedwig die still? Couldn't we have saved an innocent animal, if we're making script changes? Or maybe we could have saved Dobby? 

Not that all book adaptions are poor - one only has to look at the brilliant Sense and Sensibility to see that. Or the equally as wonderful 1995 BBC Pride and Prejudice adaption. 

This leaves me in hope that some years down the track, the BBC will make a mini series for EACH book. 6 parters for the first few, then make a whole series for the later books. 

Nonetheless, none of this has any relevance to this blog's goods - bar stools.

We're going to have two bar stools at our bench, but will have to wait until the kitchen is in to see how big they will be able to be.

$199 for two, from Milan Direct, here

Milan Direct again, $69.00 from here

From Freedom, $189, from here

Also from Freedom! $129, from here

What do we reakon guys?

I have a really good post coming up in a few days - the resolution of 'operation: front door!'.